The notion that one's upbringing is heavily influenced by their parents is a well-established truth, as exemplified by the quote from American novelist and non-fiction writer Brad Meltzer.

According to the National Center for Biotechnology Information in the United States, children inherit pairs of genes from their parents. Each child receives one set of genes from their father and another from their mother. These genes can combine in various ways, leading to diverse genetic combinations. As a result, some family members may closely resemble each other, while others may not share a strong physical resemblance, yet they will still exhibit specific inherited traits from their parents.

This genetic connection fosters a strong bond between parents and their offspring, amplifying the potential for parents to shape the development and behavior of their children.

In the African context, we often attribute a child's positive outcomes to God and negative outcomes to the devil. However, this perspective is essentially a blend of philosophy because God has never physically descended into households to directly raise or nurture a child. Instead, God typically operates through human intermediaries, such as parents or guardians, to guide their upbringing.

At times, it leaves me pondering whether the individuals responsible for the rampant criminal activities plaguing our nation have no parental figures. From which realm did they emerge, and who brought them into this world? Why does their own origin remain shrouded in silence?

As a nation, where did we go wrong? What happened to the cultural values instilled in us by our forebears?

Regrettably, our young men and women have seemingly turned to crime as a lucrative enterprise, with the taking of innocent lives becoming distressingly common.

As Internet fraudsters, commonly referred to as "Yahoo boys," engage in harmful actions, including violence against their partners for money-related rituals, young women have appeared to abandon their moral compass on platforms like TikTok and various social media channels. Many resort to revealing attire in a bid to attract potential followers.

Our society is witnessing a troubling trend where both crime and immorality are becoming increasingly accepted, with poor parenting often cited as a significant factor. This was not always the case, suggesting that something has gone awry in our culture.

This shift may be attributed, in part, to the economic hardships that have forced parents into the labor market, leaving them with limited time to impart cultural values and a sense of humanity to their children. In the relentless pursuit of financial stability, traditional values have been sidelined.

For some parents, the blame may be placed on the advent of modernity. They have become less inclined to discipline their children, perhaps out of an aversion to seeing their offspring upset. However, the consequences of this leniency may manifest later, causing parental distress.

As I grew up, I often heard the age-old adage, "It takes a village to raise a child." In essence, this saying underscores the idea that a child's upbringing is fundamentally shaped by their parents, who play a central role in the community's efforts to nurture their offspring.

This upbringing transcends mere attendance at various places of worship. It encompasses the biological, nutritional, and behavioral influence that parents exert on their children or wards. The interplay of these factors directly molds, shapes, and hones the child's mindset, choice of words, actions, and cognitive abilities.

When parents place an exclusive emphasis on financial provision, a child may soon exhibit a penchant for immediate gratification, as expressed in the Yoruba language saying, "Omo ti Iya ba ko Iya ni o Jo," which implies that a child's behavior often mirrors that of their mother.

However, a child whose parents assume dual roles as both mentors and providers will stand apart from the rest. Their distinction extends beyond mere words; it encompasses their perspective, philosophy, ideas, and way of life. Such a child is likely to evolve into a mentor for their peers.

I recently encountered one of my pupils, whose parents happened to be business owners. This particular student arrived at school equipped with materials for creative decoration, complete with all the necessary tools to craft something beautiful and embellish his uniform. He skillfully crafted a stunning bowtie and presented it to me for evaluation.

My positive feedback spurred his enthusiasm, prompting him to create additional items that captured the attention and admiration of fellow pupils. Before long, another teacher entered his classroom and noticed a gathering of students around his seat. The curious teacher inquired about the intriguing activity happening at his desk.

In response, he explained to the teacher that he was instructing his classmates on how to embellish their uniforms. The teacher, with a hint of surprise, inquired further, to which the student confirmed, "Yes, I came prepared with all the necessary materials to create a bowtie. I've already made mine, and I thought it was important to teach them, as they are helping me."

The student's response left a profound impression on the other teacher, who looked at me with amazement, recognizing the young pupil's natural leadership qualities. After the teacher departed for his class, I reflected on the incident. It became apparent that this pupil had witnessed his parents' leadership roles, particularly in their business endeavors, and had internalized these qualities.

Both of his parents were involved in business and had employees working under them. I strongly believe that this early development of a leadership mentality was a direct result of his family environment. Simultaneously, I couldn't help but imagine what might have occurred if this student had come from a family with parents who were misguided and contentious. Such an upbringing could have had a negative impact on the child or ward, potentially extending those traits to his peers, school, family, and society as a whole.

Who knows, such actions could potentially give rise to issues that may eventually pose a threat to society as a whole. It's worth noting that many criminal gangs take shape during the school years.

The behavior of the pupil underscores the idea that raising a child or ward is akin to looking into a mirror because their eventual development will inevitably mirror certain traits and characteristics of their parents or guardians.

In fact, our era has demonstrated that children are more influenced by our actions than our words. Therefore, it's evident that your capacity as a parent or guardian to create a positive impact in your child or ward's life necessitates a deliberate and responsible approach to your daily conduct.

I strongly recommend that parents lead by example, as their children are growing not only in physical resemblance but also in character, charisma, behavior, and philosophy. It's highly likely that they will mature into individuals who reflect these attributes, much like their parents.

In dealing with children, it's crucial to keep in mind that "no matter what they will become, you will always leave an imprint on them." The positive aspect of this is that you have the opportunity to proactively shape what you want to see in them by being purposeful and deliberate in your approach to raising them.

Akinremi Victoria is a dedicated private school teacher located in FCT, Abuja. She can be contacted via email at akinremivictoria06@gmail.com.